Tuesday, June 5, 2012

Man, You’ve Changed! 10 Video Characters Who Changed Completely.

Well, lookit you, man. You’ve changed! We remember you back in high school. Don’t front. You were the one trading lunch money for Mewtoo on your Pokemon game. Yeah, we remember. But look at you now. All cool and shit. Dressed for success and reading Complex. Good for you. But not everybody’s made such a smooth transition into adulthood. Some have actually made embarrassing leaps, especially when it comes to video games, where the rate of success for change is usually (Note we said “usually”) slim to none. Here are 10 such examples. Warning: Some of them aren’t pretty.

 (Image taken from: sonicthehedgehoggame.org)

10.  Sonic the Hedgehog 

If Sonic Generations has done anything, it’s proven just how much we miss the old Sonic. The old Sonic was fast, he was chubby, and most importantly, he didn’t say a damn word. But the new Sonic, well, he just won’t shut up. Oh, and he kicks it with humans, too.

Because nothing says “awesome” like interspecies dating. 

 (Image taken from: thehomefield.blogspot.com)

9. Pac-Man

Wait, Pac-man? How did he change, you ask. Well, you must have missed out on Pac-Man 2: The New Adventures. Our pellet chomping hero went from being chased by ghosts in a death arena, to walking around town and throwing litter in a trash receptacle. The life of a citizen is fine for some, but for Pac-Man? No way, man, no way. You’ve gone soft, dude. Like a pillow.

 (Image taken from: forums.gametrailers.com)

8. Poison

One of the greatest traps in the business, Poison went from being a hot biker chick in Final Fight, to a man, to a, well, we’re not quite sure anymore. But whatever “she” is, good for her. Be as bad as you wanna be, baby. We ain’t gonna hate. 

(Image taken from: kappalphaiota.wordpress.com)

7. The Prince
How do you make a sequel to a very successful game? Well, if you asked us, we’d say fix some nagging issues, add in new levels and stick a bow on it. And voila, instant sequel. But Ubisoft Montreal wasn’t having any of that. They decided to take the very likeable Prince from The Sands of Time (“Car-full. Think a-head.”) to an angst ridden emo child of the 90s in a 2005 game. Um, way to go?

(Image taken from: mortalkombat.wikia.com)

6. Sub-Zero

He started out as a regular ninja in the first two games. Then he took his mask off in the third game to show off a cool scar. Then he put the mask back on. And now…he’s a robot. Good Lord, he transforms more than Michael Jackson in the movie, Moonwalker.

(Image taken from: intradayfun.com)
5. Lara Croft
If we’re to believe the new Tomb Raider game coming out features a younger Lara Croft, then that means the old games we used to play on the PSOne feature the grown-up Lara, and good God, what what happened to her? When she was younger, she actually looked like a human being, but later (circa-late 90s), she became a mess of polygons and PS1 processing power. She looks like a plastic surgery gone wrong. And it’s a shame. She used to be stunning. 

 (image taken from: kotaku.com)

4. Raiden

Let’s chalk this one up in the improvement category. Raiden was no slouch back in Metal Gear Solid 2 (Though, what was up with the naked gymnastics?), but now in Metal Gear Rising: Revengeance, he’s a certified, sword-wielding menace. Change isn’t always a bad thing.

 (Image taken from: fanpop.com)

3. Dante
We’d be lying if we said we weren’t excited for the new Devil May Cry, but Lordy, why on earth did he decide to go all Adam Lambert on us? We’re sure he’s still a badass, but all we hear is, “What do you want from me?” whenever we look at him now. Dye it white again, please. 

(image taken from: en.wikipedia.org)
2. Conker
Conker went from being a cute, go-kart driving squirrel in Diddy Kong Racing, to being a cigar smoking, boob jumping, asshole in Bad Fur Day. And we loved him for it. Debauchery, pass it on. 

 (Image taken from: 411mania.com)

1.     1. Bomberman
If there was ever a change in video game characters, the greatest of all time would have to be Bomberman. Once an adorable man the size of a plush doll, the blue bomber became a soulless, hard-edged killing machine in Bomberman Zero, where all of his familiar features were entirely erased. Damn, Bomberman, we feel like we don’t even know you anymore.


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