Monday, November 28, 2011

Portable Plumber: The Complete History of Mario in Handheld Games

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Here's an extensive piece on every handheld Mario game ever made. Check it out here.

Sunday, November 27, 2011

Review: Fishing Resort [Wii]

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Honestly, when was the last time you played your Wii? Five months ago? Six? A whole year ago? Honestly, the line-up for the Wii has been pathetic at best and a rollicking train wreck at worst. In fact, it’s probably been even WORSE than a rollicking train wreck. Seriously, the Wii has gone downhill beyond measure. Sure, the new Legend of Zelda might make you whip it out of the closet pretty soon, but as far as third-party support is concerned, it’s basically nonexistent.

But not TOTALLY nonexistent, as made evident by Yuji Naka’s latest game, Fishing Resort for the Wii. Now I know. Fishing? Who the hell wants to play that? Well, I agree, I sure as hell don’t. But I’m not the audience for a fishing game anyway. To me, I think fishing games are about as exciting to playing golf on the PS3. In other words, I couldn’t give a crap about it.

That said, I do know that fishing games DO have an audience, even if it’s limited, and as far as that’s concerned, Fishing Resort isn’t a bad game. Yuji Naka, the creator of Sonic the Hedgehog, has managed to make a fishing game that’s at the very least enjoyable. By adding objectives and contests in the game to participate in, as well as the ability to go around your resort and talk to people, this fishing game adds a bit of flair to something that could have been a lot more mundane.

People who dig fishing games will like the added immersion of going around a resort as if this were an actual vacation. Catching fish can only take you so far, but Mr. Naka has managed to make it somewhat tolerable by giving diverse environments to go fishing in as well as the ability to ride on boats. I can’t say that this is the kind of game that will resurrect the Wii from the ashes, but it’s an enjoyable, even relaxing experience nonetheless. Catching fish is easy—you just swing your Wiimote at fish and lure them in by twirling the nunchucku. But there’s strategy involved to catching the heavier fish, and you can trade your points in and get better lures. It’s fun.

Overall, if you like fishing games and have a Wii, you might enjoy this game. If you don’t like fishing games, then you won’t give a crap about it. But you already knew that, right? Give it a try if you’re bored of the Wii’s weak lineup.

Player: 1
Platforms: Nintendo Wii
Developer: Prope
Publisher: Namco Bandai
Rating: Three stars out of five

Tuesday, November 22, 2011

Mugshot Gallery: 10 Video Game Characters Who Deserve to Go to Jail

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Mega Man (And many other video game characters) deserve to be in jail. Check out my list of who here.

Monday, November 21, 2011

Review: Super Mario 3D Land Proves to Be the First Must-Have Title on the 3DS

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The new Super Mario Bros. on the 3DS is amazing. Seriously, it is. Check out my review of the game here.

Thursday, November 17, 2011

The Top Five Oldest Looking, Yet Youngest Black Musicians Ever

It's no lie. Black men, face wise, age quickly. When I was 23, people mistook me for 33. The huge, grizzly man beard didn't help my case, but still, blacks look old when they're young. That is, of course, until we hit 35, which we can look well into our 40s. It's strange. Anywho, without further ado...

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5. T-Pain
Real age: 26
How old he looks: 34

Back in 2006 when T-Pain first appeared on the scene with the song, "I'm F**ked Up," I immediately needed to see who sang it. And when I did, I said, "Wow, he's getting into the game pretty late at 30." He was only 19 years old at the time. Point made.

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4. Wale
Real age: 27
How old he looks: 33

Wale is one year younger than me. But we look neck and neck when it comes to looking in our 30s. I always say that you have to subtract about six years when gauging how old a black dude is, and Wale is evidence of that. See?

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3. Ol' Dirty Bastard
Real age (At death): 35
How old he looked entire career: 35

'Ol Dirty Bastard is RIGHT. When did this guy EVER look young? Sure, it could be the coke that did it to him, but...yeah, it was probably the coke. Cocaine is a hell of a drug.

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2. Jimi Hendrix
Real Age (At death): 27
How old he looked: 40

There's no question, Jimi Hendrix was a rock god. But he was also damned young when he died. He was even younger than me! That said, he looked like he'd been playing geetar for over 20 years. Next to Kurt Cobain, he was the oldest looking 27 year old EVER. Alcohol is a hell of a drug.

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1. The Notorious B.I.G.
Real age (At death): 24
How old he looked: 44

Maybe it was the heavy eyelids, maybe it was the deep voice, or maybe it was just the everyday struggle lyrics, but B.I.G. looked mad old by the time he died. Amazingly, he was the youngest person on this list. Damn...

Wednesday, November 16, 2011

I Have No Time to Read, Like, At All

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I just recently got two MORE books in the mail that I've ordered and have no time to read. Both of them are by Richard Adams and both of them are not Watership Down. One of them is called Shardik, which is actually a character in Stephen King's Dark Tower series, and the other is The Plague Dogs, which was the saddest cartoon movie I've ever seen in my entire life. On my reading list, these books are way behind Foundation and Empire, a Kurt Vonnegut book of short stories, and We The Living, which I have STILL haven't finished yet. Oh, brother. When will I have the time?

The 10 Greatest Cheat Codes in Gaming History

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You want cheat codes? I got 'em. Check out my latest article here.

Tuesday, November 15, 2011

Tuesday, November 8, 2011

A Pixelated History: "Call of Duty" From Inception to Modern Warefare 3

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Here's my CoD history article. It goes from the first Call of Duty to Modern Warfare 3. Check it out here.