Wednesday, November 27, 2013

My Top Ten Favorite TV Characters Of All Time

While I'm no Alan Sepinwall, I do like to think that I watch an unhealthy amount of television. And to me, there's nothing more important to a TV show than its characters. Here's a list of my favorite TV characters of all time. Do any of mine make your list?
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10. Bruh Man from Martin

Bruh Man (From the 5th flo) was just another crazy character in a show with a multitude of crazy characters (Many of whom who were played by Martin Lawrence himself). But Bruh Man was different, and any time he'd come through Martin's window uninvited, you knew something insane but hilarious was going to come out of his mouth. Definitely my favorite character on the show. No question.

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9. Sailor Mars from Sailor Moon

The feistiest of all the Sailor Scouts, Sailor Mars was like the Raphael (The Ninja Turtle, not the painter) of the group. She wouldn't take crap from Sabrina and was definitely the hottest of all the scouts with her black hair and red miniskirt. In later years, I found that I would flock to bad girls like Sailor Mars, but I would never hook up with them. They just weren't my type. Only on TV, only on TV.

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8. Proposition Joe From The Wire

Most people would probably cite Omar or Stringer Bell as their favorite character from The Wire, but, nope, not me. That position would go directly to Prop Joe, who was always my favorite character on the show. I just loved everything about him. I loved his nuggets of wisdom, his hair style, and even the way he would lean back in his seat, like a boss, and intertwine his fingers on his gut. He was a background character to be sure, but an important one. I would always smile whenever he made an appearance on the show. RIP, big dog.

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7. Raphael from Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles Raphael was cool, but rude (Gimmie a break!), which is the reason why I loved him. Growing up in the 80s and 90s, the turtles played a huge part in my life, and Raphael was my absolute favorite. He was the rebel, the jerk, and I wouldn't have it any other way. Leonardo was definitely the leader, but Raphael was the one I always pretended to be on the playground. Gotta love those sais.

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6. Al Bundy from Married With Children

Looking back, I honestly can't believe my dad used to let me watch Married With Children when I was younger, but I'm glad he did, because I got to see one of the greatest TV dads in modern history was Al Bundy. Al was a true man of his era, and he was proud of it. Whether he was talking about scoring the final touchdown in high school or complaining about the fat chicks at his job, Al Bundy was always captivating and hilarious to watch. No, Peg.

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5. Brisco from The Adventures of Brisco County Jr.

While I know it's cool to love Firefly and Captain Malcolm Reynolds, I'll take Brisco Country Jr. any day of the week over it. You may ask, why I would make such a comparison, but I make it for a number of reasons. One is because both Firefly and Brisco County were westerns (Firefly was just a western in space), and two, it's debatable who's the better cult hero--Nathan Fillion or Bruce Campbell, and for my money, I'd going with Bruce Campbell. This was the TV role that defined him and it's why Brisco County is one of my favorite TV characters of all time. You can never get enough of the chin.

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4. Jack Bauer from 24

Before it got terrible, I used to LOVE 24. Absolutely love it. And the reason behind that love was squarely because of Jack Bauer, who was the toughest SOB on network TV. He would torture people to get what he needed and you just knew he'd make it out alive in the end. He even beat heroin in a single day. Jack Bauer, you're so cool.

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3. Homer Simpson from The Simpsons

The Simpsons might be all but unwatchable now, but back in its heyday, it was the best show on TV, bar none. And behind the laughter was Homer Simpson, who was the most dysfunctional father on television. What makes Homer so great is that he's such a moron, but entirely lovable at the same time. You can't hate him no matter what he does, even if it's strangling his own son. No other character in television history could get away with that before him. He's America's favorite dummy, a monkey that can talk.

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2. Tony Soprano from The Sopranos

Probably the most complex character to ever grace TV (Outside of my number one pick), Tony Soprano had issues, and that's why America loved him. Sure, he was the head of a NJ crime family, but what made people take notice was that Tony had probably more problems at home than he did in running his business. Played straight by James Gandolfini, Tony Soprano was fascinating in every single aspect of the word. RIP, Gandolfini. Your legacy will live on forever in your portrayal of Tony Soprano.

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1. Walter White from Breaking Bad

Anybody who knows me would have known this pick was coming a mile away. Walter White is the greatest character in television history because he had the most growth over the course of his five seasons. From mild-mannered teacher to child-poisoning scumbag, Walter White showed that every man has a dark side. It's the choice that matters, and Walter White made some of the worst and most intriguing ones. Best. Character. Ever.

Friday, November 22, 2013

The Greatest Xbox 360 Games

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Last week, we covered the greatest PS3 games of all time, and this week, we cover the greatest 360 games. Once again, my work on this was very, very minimal, but I thought I'd post it on the blog all the same. You can find it here.

Thursday, November 14, 2013

The Best PS3 Games of this Generation

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Here's an article I had barely anything to do with, but I did write a couple of blurbs so I thought I'd post it here. Click on this sentence to find it.

Friday, November 8, 2013

The Ten Best Things At Universal Studios/Islands of Adventures in Orlando, Florida

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Most people consider Universal Studios to be an afterthought to the already planned Disney vacation, the, "We'll stop off there if we have time," amusement park. But ever since I was a child, I always wanted to go to Universal Studios and never wanted to go to Disney World. It just always looked cooler to me. Well, in my adult life, I've since gone to both parks recently, and I must say that while Disney World is an all-around better amusement park, I have to admit that there's a lot at Universal Studios that I actually prefer to Disney. Here are just ten of those things.

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10. Twister: Ride It Out (At Universal Studios)

After a comical introduction by Bill Paxton, you get to actually step inside a scenario of what a real twister would look and feel like. Sure, words could express the awesomeness of watching a regular tornado turn into a "flame tornado", but I think footage would be even better, so check out the clip below some guy snagged. I was surprised at how amazing this attraction was, given the age of it. It just goes to show you that practical effects trump CG any day of the week.

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9. Hollywood Rip Ride Rockit (At Universal Studios)

In my review of the 10 best things at Disney World, one major gripe I had was the overall lack of serious roller coasters there. And while Universal Studios is no Six Flags, it definitely has a few seriously great coasters to boast of, with the Hollywood Rip Ride Rockit being one of them. I'm not going to lie, it actually gave me a headache afterward, but during the ride, I was having a blast. You get to pick your own choice of dated music to listen to while you ride (I chose "Intergalactic" by The Beastie Boys) so it can be a different experience every time you get on it. It's fun, it's fast, and it's wild. Definitely make sure you go on this ride when you go to Universal Studios. Just make sure you bring some Tylenol with you.

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8. The Crawfish Nachos at Pat O' Brien's (At City Walk)

City Walk is pretty much like Downtown Disney but with less families and more couples. There are a lot of restaurants there, but the one my wife and I decided to stop off at was Pat O' Brien's, which serves New Orleans' cuisine, even though it has an Irish name. Go figure. But let's talk about the Crawfish nachos, as they're probably, nay, DEFINITELY, the greatest nachos I've ever had in my entire life. Topped with oozing cheese, smothered in crawfish and dipped in the most heavenly sauce ever conceived of, these nachos are definitely worth your hard-earned dollars. I just wish I could say the same for the rest of their food...

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7. Dudley Do-Right's Rip Saw Falls (At Islands of Adventure)

As someone who typically hates water rides (Something about not liking getting wet), I was happily surprised by how much I enjoyed this water ride, which I got absolutely drenched on. It's all in the character. In a sense, it's pretty much a rip-off of Splash Mountain, but it's so much better. You actually have many fake dips and turns before you have the ultimate drop of your life, which is enthralling and refreshing at the same time. For a water ride, Dudley Do-Right's Rip Saw Falls is amazing. Make sure you give it a try.

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6. Despicable Me Minion Mayhem (At Universal Studios)

This amazing 3D "ride" has you behind the eyes of one of the lovable, yellow minions from the Despicable Me series. There's not much really to say besides that it's fun and creative. Your eyes will have a sensory overload with everything going on here. It's one of the best "rides" in the entire theme park.

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5. Horror Make-Up Show (At Universal Studios)

Both hilarious and informative, the Horror Make-Up Show is full of practical effects and humor. The hosts were a laugh riot and you really do see some of the ins and outs of how old-school horror flicks really got it done. If you see only one show at Universal Studios, make sure it's this one.

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4. The Amazing Adventures of Spider-Man (At Islands of Adventure)

An oldie but a goodie, The Amazing Adventures of Spider-Man , like Despicable Me Minion Mayhem is another "ride" that isn't really a ride at all in that you basically just sit in a little booth and wear 3D glasses as you're shaken all about in front of a variety of screens. What makes this particular ride so great through is how much you really feel like you're a part of Spider-Man's world. Ol' webhead himself lands on your "car" and takes you out of harm's way as Doc Oc and his minions try to attack you. If you love Spider-Man, then you'll absolutely adore this "ride".

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3. Revenge of The Mummy The Ride (At Universal Studios)

I can't believe I'm saying this but Revenge of the Mummy The Ride is one of the greatest coasters I've ever been on and here's why--I wasn't expecting anything from it and got a lot out of it. Now, maybe me talking about it will get your hopes up too much, but when I went on this indoor coaster, I was awestruck by how fantastic it was. There were flames, scarabs coming out of the walls, and enough hairpin turns and drops to make any roller coaster fan swoon. If you love indoor coasters, then you absolutely need to ride this. It's a must.

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2. Springfield (At Universal Studios)

Besides having the absolute worst ride in the park, Springfield itself is astonishing with all the detail that was put into it. Moe's is here, Krusty Burger is here, and hell, even The Comic Book Shop Guy's store is here (Though, it's only its exterior, as it's really just a bathroom). It was enough to make this old Simpsons fan want to love the show again. Almost, I said. The show is absolutely terrible now. But this side of the park is to die for. El Barto was here.

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1. The Wizarding World of Harry Potter (At Islands of Adventure)

No question about it, The Wizarding World of Harry Potter is the single best attraction at Universal Studios/Islands of Adventure. It's no contest. So much attention to detail was put into this section that it alone is worth the trip to Universal Studios. You can drink butter beer, journey into Hogwarts (And go on an amazing-and creepy-ride), and even, if you're lucky, get selected to pick out your own wand at Ollivanders. Honestly, this specific section of Islands of Adventure is pretty much better than anything I saw at Disney World, and that's saying a lot since I LOVE Disney World. But for all of the Mouse House's magic, it can't match the that found here in The Wizarding World of Harry Potter. Go to Florida just for this. It's worth it. You'll thank me later.