Which is Bigger? The Cult of Bruce, or the Cult of Nathan?

(Image taken from: sweatpantserection.com--by the way, that's the best name for a website ever)

Bruce Campbell and Nathan Fillion are both pretty much Goliath's in Geekdom territory. Mr. Campbell, the man with the chin that won't quit, has had a long career of being a B-movie actor ever since he was in the cult classic Evil Dead trilogy. Though he's directed a few films here or there and is now a permanent fixture on Burn Notice, he's never really risen beyond B-Movie status, and his fans love him for it. It's why he's awesome. Just watch him here, being Brucey. Only HE could pull this off.



(Image taken from: huffingtonpost.com)

(Image taken from: Huffingtonpost.com)

And then, you have Captain Mal himself, Nathan Fillion, whose rise to fame has been precipitous to say the very least. The head honcho on the immensely popular, if short lived, sci-fi show, Firefly, he's found a new home on Castle, accumulating new fans every week.



But whose cult is bigger?

Now, I'm not saying who has the crazier cult, as both camps have done some pretty crazy things in the names of their heroes. (I saw one woman with Ash tattooed from her fingertips to her shoulder, and let's not forget Mr. Fillion's one million dollar accumulation from fans who heard that he wanted to bring back Firefly if he had the money to do it). Both camps have done some pretty wild things. But let's look at the facts here, broken down side-by-side.

Bruce Campbell

(Image taken from: evildead.wikia.com)

Born in 1958, Bruce's first movie, The Evil Dead came out in 1981. That's before I was even born, man! That said, it means that while he may have only done bit parts or low budget flicks for his entire career, his fanbase spans 30 years. This makes him a recognizable icon in cult territory for decades, similar to Lloyd Kaufman from Troma, or John Waters. So, while not a majority of the population may know who he is, those who do adore him, and he's certainly had enough time to garner a large fanbase.

He also spans different kinds of media. Not only has he done movies, and plenty of them, but he's also done voice work, been on TV, and even has two books, If Chins Could Kill: Confessions of a B Movie Actor and Make Love! The Bruce Campbell Way . He's currently on Burn Notice as Sam Axe, and his popularity keeps growing. His cult is strong. But is it stronger than the voice of over a million browncoats? Let's look and see.



Nathan Fillion

(Image taken from: buffy.wikia.com)

Nathan Fillion is Firefly. His face and the show go hand-in-hand. There are millions of fans, or, "Browncoats" as they're called, and they follow the man like flies to a sugar heap. But his name goes much farther than that. Just recently, he appeared on the cover of Entertainment Weekly, and he's also now pretty big on the show Castle, which is growing in popularity every season. And unlike Bruce, he's actually the lead on a successful TV show now, which is a feat that Bruce Campbell has never accomplished (Even though Jack of all Trades and Brisco County Jr. were awesome shows).

He's also done movies as well, and many of his fans, most of them following him on Twitter, are pretty vocal in their support of him. They've even garnered a million dollars after he, in passing, said that if he ever won the lottery, he'd get Joss Whedon to start up Firefly again. It was a joke, of course, but fans took him very seriously. This guy's cult is huge. But is it bigger than Bruce's?



The Verdict

While Nathan Fillion is definitely on the rise, there's no way he can surpass Bruce's rabid and loyal fanbase. Bruce Campbell has simply been around much longer. And though I have little doubt that Nathan Fillion will one day reach his level, that day is definitely not now and probably won't be for quite some time. He still has some more cheesy roles to take on.

So the winner here is Bruce today. But in ten years time, who knows? Only time, and twitter posts, can tell.

The Top Ten Ways to Say WTF Without Saying WTF

(Image taken from: podbean.com)

WTF, or, "What the Frak!" to Battlestar Galactica fans, and "What the -expletive deleted-" to everybody else, is ubiquitous these days. So much so, that it's actually losing some of its awesomeness. Note: If my own mother, who watches nothing but Law and Order reruns and Judge Judy knows what it means, then it's lost its power.

So, how about using something other than those three letters that have become synonymous with everything from finding out that your favorite show has been cancelled to seeing a fat man on a motorcycle that could probably fit a family of four?

(Image taken from: mrnspace.com)

So, without further ado, here are my top ten ways to say WTF without actually saying WTF. Try them out some time, and be the envy of all of your friends. Or none of your friends. Conformity is popular these days, after all.

10. Naw, son. Naw.

(Image taken from: youknowdamnwell.com)

Calling something or someone "Son," who is clearly not your son has been a fun habit for quite some time now for both urban and suburban youths. The "Naw, son. Naw" WTF is a good one to use when you're in a state of quiet disbelief, like, "Did you know that Firefly was taken off the air?"

Naw, son. Naw.

It really does take the edge off. Try it some time.

9. Huh?! What?!

I got this one from Big trouble in Little China. In a pivotal scene in the film, Jack Burton and his crew are creeping through the sewers when suddenly, a giant, ant like thingy comes out of nowhere and kills one of the members of the entourage.

(Image taken from: asixdemonbag.blogspot.com)

Egg Shen, the guide for the group, takes out these little ball thingies and shouts, "You come out no more!" and throws it at it, causing it to explode. After this happens, Jack Burton goes, "HUH? WHAT?! What comes out no more?!" So this variation of WTF can be used for an angry scream, like, if you have your car broken into or you find out that your girlfriend has been cheating on you with a cardboard cutout of Legolas from The Lord of the Rings. Use the volume with discretion, though. You don't want to shout this TOO loudly. People in the other room might think that you're deaf or something.

8. Ribet, Ribet, I can't hold it

(Image taken from: bigsong.net)

This one comes from the bathroom level of the first Parappa the Rapper. In it, Master Prince Fleaswallow (And yes, that is his name) is lamenting the fact that the last toilet that he had, he already sold it. So, yeah, WTF, man, with a FML added on for good measure. Make sure you say this with a Jamaican accent to be authentic.



7. Nooooooo!

You ever have the urge to just throw your head back and yell, WTF, man! Well, why do that when you can spread out your arms, ham it up and just say, "NOOOOOOOO!" instead? Hey, it worked for Vader. Or did it?




6. Get outta here, man. Get out!

(Image taken from: hugetinymistake.wordpress.com)

Seeing somebody catch a football with their helmet is a HUGE WTF moment. But say you have kids in the house and were a Patriots fan, say, in 2008. Do you see where I'm going with this? Instead of shouting those three words at the screen, screaming, "Get outta here, man. Get out!" followed by a strange, Ric Flair strut around the room, would probably be more appropriate. Taking off all your clothes and doing an elbow drop is optional, though.



5. Well, I'll be a monkey's landlord

(Image taken from: vi.sualize.us)

This is one of those, "Why bother," WTF's. Like, "Well, I'll be a monkey's landlord. I'm going to die one day anyway, so I might as well just start today with my fifth pack of smokes. Cough cough." Something like that.






4. Well, blow my nose!

This is another one that's sort of an exclamation of, WTF did I just see? It can usually be followed by the thing that somebody should be blowing your nose over, like, "Well, blow my nose, is that kid REALLY smoking a cigarette, or is the pic below just photoshopped? Dang. That's messed up if it's true."

(Image taken from: thenoobdad.com)














3. What in tarnation?!

Another surprised one, but this one is much more forceful. It's like WTF, you like HER? But instead, it sounds more like, "What in tarnation, you like her?!" See? Isn't that more interesting? You'll be a regular old coot in no time. I promise.

(Image taken from: myconfinedspace.com)


















2. What in blue blazes?

This is one of those, you left your house for the weekend only to come back and find a naked guy sitting on your couch and smoking from a bong, moments. This one is also good if you wear a monocle, because said monocle can fly off your face and into your champagne glass. This one's a keeper.

(Image taken from: blogs.pitch.com)

















1. What in Sam Hill?!?!

Is Sam Hill a person? A place? Wikipedia says that it's a euphemism for the Devil, as in, "What the Devil?" But I think it's a euphemism for something else. And I think you know what that something else I'm talking about is. The F dash, dash, dash word, making it my favorite WTF substitute of all time. It's just so OUT there, and it makes you look like Fog horn Leghorn. You look out of your mind, which is something I'm always interested in looking like. Out of my mind. Try it next time you get the urge to SCREAM FTW. You'll feel all the more better for it.